God, I really hate life atm. I had this huge arguement with that guy.
Then I felt guilty, and tried to fix everything, which only made everything worse, which made me feel worse.
I've been cutting fuck loads lately, and during sports at school, someone apparently noticed(I had to show some exercise with my arms up).
I told my friend about my cuttingproblem, and now I feel I shoudln't haev told her, because I don't want all this fucking attention.
3 tests of school are pretty low grades. I usually get fcking high grades, that everyone calls me a nerd while I barely learn.
I can't focuss anymore, I've had like a breakdown at school today cuz I couldn't take it anymore, and my friends were giving me too much attention, I couldn't take it.
I just want to kill myself.
When I bike to school, I just want to get in front of a car.
I only don't do it cause a good friend oof my friend killed herself a while ago, and I don't want her to go trough that again. I think I've never felt this bad before. Fuck life.
Maybe you should take to a trusted adult about your suicidal thoughts... this is very serious, if you are feeling this bad.
I just don't get why I would even make the effort in seeing a person, I mean, my family don't care about me, school isn't important, no one really cares about me..So why would I try making myself feel any better?