I hate my fucking life. Finally my mood got better cuz my christmasgifts were gonna be awesome, I was gonna get 3 Hell Bunny dresses. But guess what, one was out of stock, one's too small, one's too big. Oh joy. I feel like fcking crap! I just want to die. And yeah, it's not just about the dresses. First of all, if my parents would've let me order it earlier, I would've had 3 dresses in size 8, not one in size 6 and one in size 10. I told Justin that I can't get him out of my head, not that I'm in love with him, just that. He was like wtf. Johan asked me out I think, but I'm not even in love with him, though I said I'll think about it, not no. Pieter fcking drives me crazy with acting so fcking happy, while my life is fcking falling apart. I told Nele about my cuttingproblem, but she doesn't help me at all. I want to see someone about my problems, but I never take action, and I'm too afraid to ask my parents, and I mean, they wouldn't care anyway, cause a few weeks ago I had a breakdown at percussion, my sis forced me to go back home and my parents banned me from the computer for two weeks, cause they just thoguht I didn't wanrt to go.
Mum saw a cut yesterday. Fuck that.
I just want to die. I hate this. WHy the hell am I even here anymore?