I needed to write this off me, it's been some week...
1.My ''friend'' is just fucked up. She can't just be like normal! Like, when in class they ask her to turn off the light, she's like "yeah! got dam it, waiy a fcking sec!" and just hit like that and she's like so dan obsessed by her hair, god forbid when it rains! Than her hair gets wet, oh no! WHO FCKING CARES IF YOUR HAIR GETS FRICKIN WET?! And always talking about HER life, cause our life obviously is NOT important! HER LIFE IS BARELY CALLED A FCKING LIFE! And she just keeeeps following my friend and I, even though we both made it vey clear we don't want to talk to her.
2.It's getting really hard with my friend, Jess, who's so shy and silent. I want to talk to her and ask her for advice, but she's so shy, silent, fragile that I can't. Im trying really hard to get her to losen up a bit, but it's really making me tired. SHe's been my best friend for almost 3 years now, yet nothing seems to change. She...I'm afraid she'll change school cause of the bullies in her class. It means Ill lose my best friend.
3.There's this guy at school, Dennis, who accidently caught my eye. And I'd like to get to know him, but don't dare. Everyone alread told me to say something, anything to him. But somehow, I just don't manage to. My "friend" says he's ugly, while I don't think so. I wish he'd be ugly. Something about him drawed m attention. But I don't know him. And everytime I see him on school, I'm thinking like "Why can't I just walk up to him and say something?". It's just driving me crazy.
I've also cutted again, cause obviosuyl my sister is ashamed to have me as a sister. Cutting just makes me feel better, the red colour makes me feel better. EVen though I thought I stopped. But once you cutted, you'll always cut. it's like drugs.
ps. I'm still writing at least 1 poem a day, or writing on a story I just started. Sorry I haven't posted them on here.
Listening to: Bring Me The Horizon - Suicide Season
Reading: Norah MClintock
Playing: Canon - Pachelbel